Hi and welcome back to our series of articles on how to be more confident. First, please review the first article on how to be more confident as well as the second one in this series before you get started here.
The first step beyond what we’ve discussed with learning how to be more confident is how you dress. As the old saying goes, if you want the part you need to dress for it.
You would not expect a new employer to hire you if you showed up wearing jeans and a torn shirt, how can you expect to be more confident if you’re not dressing that way?
Step Two: Move and Sit like a Confident Man would
As we touched on in a previous article, your body language plays a huge role in your ability to be more confident. What’s interesting is that many studies show that how you move, walk, talk and even sit impacts your physiology and how you feel about yourself.
What’s really interesting is that you can be in a really bad mood and just by reminding yourself to sit like a confident person would, you suddenly will feel more relaxed and confident.
Next time you have a moment, go to a public place like a hotel lounge and sit in one of their bigger lounge chairs. Take a few deep breaths, let your shoulders and back completely relax.
Spread your arms out and lean slightly back but with your neck still arched up and looking forward with a slight (but not goofy) smile on your face such as pictured here. Maintain that position for just a few minutes and note how you feel. Try this a few times throughout your day and also be aware of how people are looking at you as they walk by.
Step 3: For those that Have a Fear of Doing Challenging Things
This may seem a bit perplexing to some of you and to others it will seem like common sense. If you have read our previous articles on how to get more confident you’ll recall you have to do things you’re afraid of to flex your confidence muscle.
If you find that just doing those things creates so much anxiety, such as approaching a pretty woman and starting a conversation, you may need to confront some of your “inner fears”. To do this there are many methods; some go jump out of a plane, some enroll in the military or walk across hot coals.
All of these ideas may have some validity but at the end of the day much of your fears are based on one important concept: Your fear of conflict, the fear of failing and/or possibly being hurt physically, emotionally or mentally.
One of the best techniques is to actually face the fear of conflict by getting into the ring and sparring with others. Other ideas like taking a martial arts class seem viable but the point here is that you actually have to get hit and risk actual physical pain.
Almost every town or city has a boxing class you can take nearby and some are very inexpensive. This also requires conditioning which is also critical to your health and appearance.
Confronting another man is an extremely masculine thing to do and will help you put out a much more attractive and confident “vibe”. There are of course other ways to accomplish this but nothing really equates to getting into a structured and controlled fight.
We really cannot explain how you feel after you do this or what the impact will be to your psyche, this is something you simply MUST do if you want really want to be more confident with women. This will also go a long way to helping you deal with conflict and challenges in all areas of life, a critical masculine trait.